21 October, 2009

feeling emotional

Many people, my husband being a perfect example, are emotional moved by music. Certain songs & lyrics remind them of a memory and sometimes lyrics say something they couldn't explain better themselves.
Brandon is an amazing musician and he spends hours pouring his heart into writing and producing. And I can tell by listening to his finished work that there is a lot of emotion there, in the lyrics and in every note. At times it's hard to understand such a strong passion for something that almost no one ever hears or sees, but then I remind myself that I, too, have a deep, emotional passion about something that is something that only I can truly understand.

Obviously I love to take photographs. Professional I am not, but photography is an outlet for me. Sometimes I look at a photo and just want to cry. Not in a sad way, but you know how you feel when you hear a song that was really popular at your High School prom? That's how I feel when I took at a picture of my son's toes in a pile of leaves or a shot of just my daughter's very mismatched skirt and socks. I can't explain it really, but a wave of nostalgia and intense love knocks me over.

Many of my photos could easily be disreguarded and easily forgotten by many because they are off center and out of focus. I try to capture the moment just as it is, from my own personal point of view. I don't ever want to forget my children being so young and innocent.

17 October, 2009

Fall Favorites

I LOVE Fall! I seriously cannot get enough of it. We were kind of robbed of a full, hot summer so I'm really counting on fall to come through and give us a nice season before the brutal midwest winter that will be arriving very soon.

The kids, my mom, Hannah, and I visited a pumpkin patch today. We drove out to Skelly's Farm Market. The kids and I went several times this summer to pick strawberries & play on the awesome handmade playground but this was our first FALL visit. There were pumpkins galore! Seriously, everywhere we turned were piles and piles of pumpkins. Little ones, big ones, green ones, white ones, and of course, orange! Brian was totally enthralled with the big round pumpkins everywhere and loved playing on them.

The place was totally packed so we didn't play very long. We went through the shop, bought some yummy snacks and headed home.

This will DEFINITELY be a tradition this fall. I want to go to other Apple Orchards and Pumpkin Patches that are further away but Skelly's is the perfect little get away because it's not too far and not too big.

14 October, 2009

October 14, 2002

Seven years ago Brandon and I had "the talk" that we were ready to start dating and be an 'exlusive' couple. I had been writing him letters telling him that I felt that we really were meant to be together & we needed to try dating to see where things would go. The first time I wrote him was in May of that year and he didn't address the letter for months. I think he was taken by surprise when I first gave it to him because at the time, I was just his friends little sister. He and my sister Sara were really close friends and he was giving my brother, Tyler, guitar lessons. So the time we spent together was always in a large group and never about "us."

So, back to the letter. :) I poured my heart out, explaining this connection I felt with him and that it was more than just a friendly thing. I gave it to him one evening after playing cards with a group of friends. I remember being nervous all night long, knowing that at some point I had to 'man up' and hand over the letter. As we were all getting ready to leave, I grabbed it out of my bag and pretty much threw it at him. LOL I was so nervous that I didn't even say a word...just ran out. Like I said before, he didn't even acknowledge the letter for a quite some time. Can you imagine how awkward that was???

Finally, in SEPTEMBER, he told me one day that we needed to talk. He came over to my house that night and we talked for hours about the letter, 'us', and the future. He agreed that there was "something" going on but he was unsure if it was just a feeling or something more. I knew from the beginning that it was something more but I also knew that I couldn't convince him of that. He would have to discover that on his own. He told me that he'd been praying and talking to a friend about it all. He told me he needed more time to think about it but didn't want to leave me hanging. Uh hello! I had just been waiting for 4 months man! haha

So, October rolls around. I don't actually remember too many of the details and dates but things kind of just changed as we started seeing eachother more. The connection that I had felt months ago starting becoming more apparent and I think he let his guard down a little bit and was able to see it. At times I wonder WHY he was so guarded and apprehensive about our relationship at first but I know now that God had it that way for a reason. Brandon is a really emotional person and a very deep thinker. He has a hard time just jumping into things and following his heart, especially something as big as a serious relationship. He had had a few relationships in the past, whereas I had never been in one so I was quick to follow my heart and of course, being a 16 year old girl, I was totally smitten with him and just had to act on it. :) He needed to be 'reasonable' and think out every detail. LOL

And well, I guess the rest is history. :D I actually didn't know our official anniversary was on October 14th until several months later. We were working at Kmart together and he paged me over to his cash register (LOL) and gave me a reciept with the date October 14, 2002 stamped all over it. I was like, "Um, thanks?" And he said, "That's our anniversary!" Hahaha I was so happy that at least ONE of us remembered. It was so sweet!

I wish I could find a picture of our early dating years. Everything was on film back then and I digging up the negatives sounds like a lot of work. :)